*People must care, because about
Do you have a case where you want to win, or need to win your case?
Do you have the winning facts? Do you know what law would or would not support your position? Do you want or need an actual litigator for your case?
Hiring an advocate (attorney litigator) is not the same as hiring collaborative attorneys. Also, mediating* a case with only one attorney means ...The mediator helps people talk the issues through, supposedly helping to "settle" the dispute themselves. In this attorney's opinion, it would not be recommended in most cases, because typically the overbearing spouse simply bulldozes the other spouse.
*[Mediation for visitation is not the same thing as mediation of an entire divorce case. Mediation for visitation/custody is required by law in CA when there is no agreement.]
There are many pitfalls that can arise in divorce; many of them involve financial transactions that one spouse had no knowledge of; assets that one spouse did not know about; children that were conceived outside the marriage and spouse never knew other spouse was paying; secret business dealings that was predicated on all cash; illegal actions by one spouse implicating the other spouse who had no knowledge; large debts racked up by one spouse, without the other spouse even knowing such debt existed; one spouse signing the other spouse's name for a credit card, then ruining the other spouse's credit.... NONE of these things, in this attorney's opinion, should be addressed in either mediation or collaborative law scenario.
That is because there was a huge breach of fiduciary duty that has serious consequences to the guilty spouse. That should be done in court since the guilty spouse should have to pay for wrongdoing. (Of course if you are too afraid because your spouse might try and kill you then you better go get help right away.)
Especially if you have issues in the 3 lines below, which happened BEFORE the case finalized---- you should never hire anyone except an advocate litigator. Aggressive at that. Plus, there are huge time barriers to trying to set aside any of this!
Failure to Exchange Declarations (Assets Debts)-or-
when exchanged, i.e.--have false, misleading or improper numbers, values, dates..
When clients hire attorneys to get something done, especially in family law, it's often because one SIDE tried to take advantage of the other side. If you have a family law case where both of you AGREE on everything then you may not need separate attorneys, except perhaps to create a settlement agreement.
However if you actually never knew your legal rights and decided to just move ahead without knowing if what you were doing could harm you, that is dangerous. One caveat--beware the notion to eliminate spousal support in the future, NEVER give up that right. If you do, and you shack up with someone down the line, the other side has ability, potentially, to eliminate your support.... I can't say more re this topic because it is more complicated than it appears. Just BEWARE!! You should consult an attorney before making any key decisions.
HOWEVER, the vast majority of most divorces and break ups, are because the couple cannot agree on a lot of things, including (just an example....) post judgment orders.........
How to raise the kids-- too lenient? too strict?
How to spend income from employment or inheritance
What to do with spouse that is either dangerous, aggressive, drinks too much
How to get out of supervised visits?? You have an ex spouse also?
Your spouse is bipolar and can't be controlled?
Of all the problems attorney has seen over several decades, the problems around children tend to generate the worst issues, followed by physical harm, financial issues, and alcohol or drug use.
And remarkably, attorney has seen clients REFUSE to take what he/she is entitled to, and then SETTLE a case by using an attorney who is or was a mediator, --- in other words, the attorney is not acting as a litigator for the client?
You THEN have to hire new attorneys!!
While mediation and collaborative may be good for some cases (which means you are settling case by paying people to settle it without court)-- it is essentially negotiation. Judges are not involved. If you work something out and then don't like it later--- what you have -- is a problem.
Some of the down sides of collaborative law (which includes hiring people like accountants and other experts) and which makes it costly:
The Expense; Impact of termination and cost of new counsel; No advocacy for one or both parties; directed conversation between parties, power imbalances, difficult issues might remain secret (such as domestic violence, addictions, drugs, gambling, infidelities,etc.); Possible inadequate information collection, potentially less support for views of children.
Basically, in mediation there is no advocate for YOU.
In collaborative law, BOTH sides work on issues, but NO ONE is an advocate for YOUR side.
The collaborative view is to work out issues, not really take sides as an advocate----a true advocate is there to represent YOU, not the spouse.
Private mediation means both parties choose to use one mediator to arrive at some agreement, and because a mediator does not dispense legal advice the way a legal advocate would do--as in actual litigation--where each party is represented by their own separate attorney-- the "mediator" himself or herself--- is only assisting both parties to REACH an agreement.
*** Carefully NOTE-- the mediator does not need to assure either party that the agreement is fair or equitable to either party.
LOL-- that's fine if you don't care what you are getting,
or you don't know your rights and you don't care about
about that either??
Unfortunately---if you do this and "then" realize you lost out on something
because you did NOT know your rights at all---then guess what???
You are in trouble, most likely.
There is one family law attorney site down in So Cal which is fantastic, and according to their site, they usually win their cases. However. what I noted from the site, previously, is that they do not take certain types of cases, including Domestic violence or Restraining Orders. They may have changed that presently though.....They appear to represent well to do clients with cases that end up winning, and they are not afraid to give the summary of why, how, when?
Another very well known family law site down in the CA desert area, is excellent, and the attorney has or had a great amount of information which is useful. (His last name is Arnold...) What is cool about his site, is that he is not afraid to throw his opinion out there on cases, especially when it comes to what went wrong, and what not to do? Sometimes it actually is pretty entertaining to read!! And the attorney is super, super intelligent as well, obviously.
All people reading and browsing should use their own diligence to obtain correct information and for checking laws, we would use findlaw.com. If you do not have money to spend for an attorney and have been married a long time, or over 10 years, or have special needs kids, or have been abused, do NOT simply ignore the law and give your other half whatever he/she says to do. Consult an attorney to make sure you are not being screwed over and taken advantage of !!